All Questions are Welcome
A college classroom
lecture. The professor is giving a typical lecture where students are
taking notes. The professor seems approachable and well-read.
Teacher: "This
is kind of a complex subject. Are there any questions about this topic?"
Student (raises hand,
is called on): "Uh, yeah, is this shit boring as FUCK or what?"
(looks around) "Am I right?" (light, sparse grumbles from a
couple other students)
Teacher (takes off
glasses): "I'm sorry, what the fuck did you just say? Get down here
and say that shit to my face!"
Student: "Fuck
you, I will!"
Teacher: "Do
it, pussy!"
Student (stays seated):
"Pffft!"
Teacher: "Anyways,
mitochondria..."
...
Teacher: "Any
questions or comments?"
Student (same as
before): "Yeah, I have a question."
Teacher: "Good.
All questions are welcome. There's no such thing as a stupid question."
Student: "Whatever.
Anyways, my question is: How the fuck do you get off doing this shit?
How do you fuckin' sleep at night?"
Teacher: "I'm
sorry, I can't hear you from all the way back there in Pussyland."
Student: "No,
I'm the one who's sorry..."
Teacher: "You're
forgiven."
Student: "...sorry
that these poor kids have to spend another minute bored out of their minds
while you selfishly ramble on about your problems."
Teacher: "Here's
my answer - ask me that after class and I'll answer it...BITCH."
(the teacher never gets angry enough to warrant an exclamation point)
Student: "That's
not an answer, and even if it was, it wouldn't be a sufficient answer."
Teacher: "Bring
your attitude down here and I'll show you an answer, faggot."
Student: "I'll
come down there and ask the question again, geezer."
Teacher: "Do
it, you fucking piece of shit douchebag."
(Show shot of whole
classroom, with student and teacher both staying where they are.)