"Anything That Walks"

(Three males are sitting in a living room, doing nothing but talking.)

Male #1: "Yeah, she's really nice."

Male #2: "Yeah."

Male #3: "I'd fuck her!"

Male #1: "Oh, come on, Stephen, you'd fuck anything that walks."

Male #3: "What? I'm not that picky. I mean, I'm not like Bradley." (points at Male #1) "Only fucks the fat chicks, right, Bradley?" But as for me, what I fuck doesn't have to be able to walk, or talk, or be breathing. Hell, as long as it's got a hole, I'm in."

(Male #3 humps some obscure inanimate object.)

Male #3: "I'm not one of these rich, upper-class, wealthy, loaded, prosperous, well-off, elite, affluent type people who only have sexual relations with other rich, upper-class, wealthy, loaded, prosperous, well-off, elite, affluent type people. I'm not a huge prick with no feelings who only cared about myself. I'm not one of these 'destroy the environment for my own good' type tycoons. I'm not one of them big oil/gas/petroleum execs. I'm not like those big-shot corporate execs. I'm not comparable to say, Hitler, or say, Stalin."

(Continues along the same lines while humping random objects around the living room.)