Crying Oneself to Sleep
Male #1: "So, did you
get it for me today, man?"
Male #2: "Oh, shit.
No, man...sorry, dude, I forgot. I can get it to you tomorrow, though."
Male #1: "....okay...I'm
gonna go cry myself to sleep now."
(Takes off tie, starts unbuttoning his shirt and walking towards his bedroom.)
Male #2: "Oh, dude, come on. I'm sorry, man! I could try picking
it up now if you want, or..."
Male #1: "What are
you talking about?...I'm not mad or anything...chill out."
Male #2: "You're not sad?"
Male #1: "No......."
(Confused.)
"Oh!....You think 'cos I'm crying myself to sleep because I'm disappointed
by that?"
Male #2: (Nods.)
Male #1: "Nah, man!
Haha! I always cry myself to sleep...every single joyful night, man. Crying
oneself to sleep is tight. You should try it, bro...it's fucking incredible!
I luv crying myself to sleep. It's what I look forward to all day, actually.
All I ever do is cry and sleep, or some variation thereof. I'll cry myself
to sleep, I'll cry myself awake, I'll cry while sleeping, I'll cry thinking
about sleeping, I'll dream about crying, I'll have nightmares about crying,
I'll cry about lack of sleep, I'll sleep because of lack of crying lately,
I'll cry and sleep simultaneously, I'll cry for a minute then sleep for
a minute then wake up and cry for a minute, I'll cry because I'm not sleeping,
and I'll sleep because I'm not crying. That's my life. I'm happy. I couldn't
be happier." (Starts crying.) "I'm so happy...look, I'm crying!
They're tears of happiness! Hap-pi-ness!!!"